OFFICE PICKS: NOVEMBER 2017

November 1, 2017/ / ARTICLES/ Comments: 16

As much time as we at Jenkem spend thinking about ourselves, we pay attention to other junk too. We like music and movies, we enjoy a tasty beverage, hell, some of us can even read! So we’re introducing a new monthly segment called Office Picks.

Every month we’ll share the nerdy and not so nerdy things we’re listening to, reading, watching, eating, and ashamed of. Check out our November 2017 picks, you might even find something here more important in your life than Jenkem (as crazy as that may seem).

Listening to…

Lydia Lunch “Atomic Bongos”
Full of rancor and confrontational nihilism over a jangly guitar and driving fuzz – this song rips. I first heard of Lydia Lunch through her work with Nick Cave’s first band, The Birthday Party. So if you like him and hate yourself, listen to this on repeat.

Reading…

“Love in the Time of Robots” – Wired
The future is looking creepier and creepier as we get closer and closer to sticking our proverbial dicks in that uncanny valley of android sex bots.

Watching…

Nobuhiko Obayashi’s “House”
A super trippy Japanese fantasy-horror flick where a haunted house comes alive and eats its inhabitants? Oh, it’s also a parable of the atomic bombing of Hiroshima? Sign me up.

Brewing & Pooing…

Harmless Harvest Coconut Water
Tastier, pinker (and more expensive) than the rest of the million coconut waters available at the closest gentrified bodega, this gets these dry bones feeling hydrated. Please hit me with a box, Harmless Harvest, I can’t afford to live so good.

Ashamed of…

My switch push
It’s so bad that I’m too embarrassed to even practice it in the streets. Swongo is chill if you’re Tiago or Kalis, but, sadly, I am not those dudes.

Listening to…

Frank Sinatra At The Sands [Live Album]
Sinatra’s greatest hits have been beat to death, but this live album adds a layer of magic and a feeling of invincibility that makes skating down the street a whole lot more fun.

Reading…

“The Phones We Love Too Much” – NYT
I just started putting my phone in another room before bed (as suggested in this article) and it has helped overall with quality of sleep and not waking up in the middle of the night and anxiously scrolling through Instagram.

Watching…

Pinky & the Brain
Suprisingly genius and there’s a lot of adult humor / cultural commentary in there that you most likely missed as a kid.

Brewing & Pooing…

Water with lemon & mint
The Monday go-to when I’m still hungover from the weekend and need to detox.

Ashamed of…

Whenever I skip the skate sesh for a yoga class instead.


Listening to…

Warsaw – Warsaw (1994)
Joy Division when they still had some pent up punky rage and before they became the gloomy version of themselves we all know. Even has some early versions of JD classics like “Transmission” and “Shadowplay”.

Reading…

“Alt-White: How the Breitbart Machine Laundered Racist Hate” – Buzzfeed
If you still have doubts about whether the right-wing media machine that helped propel our current president into office had any White Supremacist ties, just read this.

Watching…

Curb Your Enthusiasm: Season 9
As a master of constantly finding myself in painfully awkward situations, I’ve always identified with the Curb version of Larry David. Each episode always teaches me a thing or two about how to embrace / correct my unintentional dickish-ness and sometimes-blatant ignorance.

Brewing & Pooing…

Argo Tea Green Tea Ginger Twist
Found this at the bougie bodega down the street from our office a few weeks back and am now hooked. Both refreshing and tasty as fuck. The ginger bits are great for digestion after my fat boy lunches, and probably help alleviate any soreness a bit as well.

Ashamed of…

Using “I gotta go skate tomorrow” as an excuse to leave early from a Halloween party.

Listening to…

NPR’s Embedded
I’m a big fan of conspiracy and political podcasts mainly because I’m too lazy to read about politics and not willing to watch a three hour long video on YouTube. Lately, Embedded has taken their outrage out on Trump.

Reading…

“That Time I Hired a Professional Masturbation Coach” – Narratively
I didn’t know if I was doing it right either after reading this, but I don’t think I want to pay someone to watch me.

Watching…

Netflix’s Untold American History
Oliver Stone shits on basically everything that you learned in elementary school. If I ever have kids I’m showing them this as opposed to hearing about our history from a high school teacher with whisky on their breath.

Brewing & Pooing…

Taco Bell Crunchwrap Supreme
It’s a blessing and a curse that Taco Bell is open until 3 AM. It’s a blessing because the line is long enough to smoke a spliff before you get to order. It’s a curse because T-Bell hangovers are worse than the gnarliest whiskey shits.

Ashamed of…

Smoking a cig while pooping last night
I woke up at 3 AM with the poop cramps, strolled into the bathroom, opened a window, and lit one up.

Listening to…

Marc Maron’s WTF with Marilyn Manson
I never listened to Marilyn Manson as a kid, but his takes on teenage growing pains, ditching hypocritical religions, and foretelling being blamed for the Columbine shooting give something for everyone to grab onto. Manson’s also one of the few rock legends who still openly does coke. Weird but refreshing.

Reading…

“When Should A Child Be Taken From His Parents?” – New Yorker
If you’ve ever or never wondered how Child Protective Services functions and malfunctions, read this. Parenting isn’t easy, for anyone.

Watching…

Netflix’s American Vandal
If all mockumentaries were this good I might watch more mockumentaries. Like Law and Order but the rapist is a high school jock who loves drawing dicks and doesn’t rape.

Brewing & Pooing…

Broccoli with garlic & rice wine
This tastes better than your favorite Chinese restaurant and you can add it to basically any meal. Here’s my recipe.

Ashamed of…

Clamoring over Epicly Later’d
I know they’re not as skate heavy as the Epicly Later’d web version, but I cannot get enough of these. When there was a delay in the Chad Muska one showing online, I was so pissed I punched myself in the head.

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Comments

  1. skate accountant

    November 1, 2017 1:08 pm

    make more stat! I’m stuck in this shitty business class and reading jenkem articles looks like I’m actually working (p.s. i really like this series)

  2. Joeyjojo Shabadough Jr.

    November 1, 2017 4:54 pm

    Untold American History is filled with historical inaccuracies, Oliver Stone comes off sounding like a Stalin apologist.

  3. floyd

    November 1, 2017 5:55 pm

    i miss u larry

  4. gentle_dave

    November 1, 2017 6:07 pm

    buzzfeed is whack af

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