Fitting in at a new skatepark is stressful. You don’t know what tricks look cool on what obstacles yet, and you always feel like you’re in everyone’s way. Even if you land a hardflip down the 7-set, nobody is going to give you props if you haven’t earned your rep. So here’s some advice for moving up the skatepark hierarchy. Remember, without respect you’re basically a scooter kid.
1. Offer Free Trick Tips
Landing tricks is hard, and most skaters are too shy to ask for advice. Make it easy by grabbing their board when they are sitting down and showing them the proper technique. Works best if you have a Hockey board or Dime beanie on so they know you’re not just some random dude, but a homie “that knows wassup”.
2. Discreetly offer the goods
Help folks stay chillin by approaching everyone at the park and letting them know that 1) you got fat nugs, 2) they’re dank as fuck, and 3) it’s $40 a gram. After making your rounds, set up a blunt rolling station on the picnic table in the middle of the park so no one misses you.
3. “Gorilla Marketing”
People always want to stay on top of the trends, so make sure everyone at your park knows all about your upcoming brand. They’ll be eager to buy your patented grip tape, bushings, or wireless headphones at the park, but it’s better to stay exclusive and just tell them to follow your brand on @Instagram. Just make sure to remind ‘em who put them on ;)
4. Do Your Part
Say it with me, C o m m u n i t y. Skateboarding is all about looking out for the sk9 community, So even if you can’t skate every rail or ledge, don’t be afraid to wax something if you see someone sticking on it. Skating is like cooking: you can never have too much butter.
5. Keep It Real
You seen the movie KIDS? Those guys all became legends, so just do what they did. Keep the park up to date with that authentic urban feel by starting fights with skaters, spray painting your tag on the ramps, and spitting as much as possible to mark your territory. Respekt!
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January 25, 2019 2:24 am
You forgot complete disregard for “lines”. And that the term “Snake” is reserved for only the true greats. Sk9 or dead.
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January 25, 2019 4:24 am
This made me fucking laugh cus it’s so serious Lmfao
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January 25, 2019 4:25 am
Not to say it was bad it dose have some good tips in it
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January 25, 2019 7:39 am
First off, if you have to tell kids to smoke & sell weed to fit in at the skatepark this generation is fucked…
Second off, this is the most outlandish article about skateboarding in 2019.
Don’t use movie reference, be yourself.
Don’t go around telling people trick advice if you don’t know them.
& lastly, have fun & fucckk if people notice you…
Jenkem, you sir have pulled a “Dick Move” on the skate community… If kids do anything on this list, their friends are gonna be cocky assholes with no respect…
Honestly, I hope this whole article is a sarcastic joke…
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January 25, 2019 11:21 am
You really don’t know what a joke is, do you?
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January 26, 2019 8:51 pm
Good thing it was. It’s jenkem, dude, they definitely never use sarcasm.
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January 25, 2019 9:07 am
Get fucked dickheads
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